Single Parents! Saving Sanity

Sanity is such a vague word...what's sane to me could be insane to you. It's a vicious circle that absorbs every ounce of being in a single parent. This is coming to you from experience - a lot of experience! My boys are 17 and 15...and I'm a borderline insane woman at times! The easiest way to keep yourself normal is to make sure you still have independence...and a little alone time. Unfortunately, I never really had much time to myself. When I'm at work, I'm surrounded by teenagers...when I'm home...well, you figure it out. My world revolves around my boys - it always has - it always will. The problem now is that they won't need their mommy much longer. If you don't keep your sanity when your kids are younger, it will be harder to hold onto it when they're grown. I'm stuck trying to figure out where I belong in this world...who I am as a person.

My advice is simply put...if I would have taken my own advice, I wouldn't be writing this article. To all single parents out there - whether you're a mother or a father - keep your social circle open. Make sure you do things for yourself, as well as for your children. It will make you both much happier and it will make the transition a bit easier to swallow as your kids get older. A lot of parents out there are like me...a perfect combination of sane and insane. We try to overcompensate out of the guilt due to a missing parent...guilt from barely making ends meet. That stress alone is enough to drive anyone over the edge. Walk your path cautiously...hold your children close...but give yourself some space.

As I try to figure out who I am, I remember that I will always be mom. My kids will always need me...maybe not as much as once before...but I'll still be needed. This is the point in my life when I should be enjoying myself, and I'm determined to figure out how...my sanity depends on it. I could always spend some extra time with my friends - outside of work. Maybe even stop off to see a late night movie. The world is my own...it's time to put my insanity to rest...permanently! I'm going to sit back...relax...enjoy my children...and my grandson! After all, now my son has taken on the role of 'single father'...which leaves me with wondering one thing. As he raises his son, will he learn to appreciate all that I ever did for him...I'm sure he will. My one hope is that he'll be able to hold onto his sanity a bit longer than I held onto mine.

Does the Media Cause Crime...

This topic seems to cause quite a stir among all generations! Does the media cause crime...I would have to say no. Does it have a hand in promoting crime...that's a solid yes.

There is a thin line that should be walked among those in the media industry. While it's important for citizens to stay informed of different events, it's equally as important for us not to be overwhelmed by them. The media definitely plays it's part in glamorizing the "murder down the street" while downplaying the importance of other issues.

Let me give you an example...or many examples...

OJ Simpson's face was plastered on every media venue known to man after being accused of murder. He was one of the best football players of all time...but, you saw him more as the "accused killer". Walk through any book store and I'm sure you'll find more titles about his crimes than about his career!

Michael Vick...yes, another football player! I would have to say he is one of the most talented quarterbacks I've seen in a long time. BUT...you would know him better as the "dog fighter". Honestly, don't we see things like that in every town. I guess since he's famous, the media feels the need to give him a "higher than God" status.

Barry Bonds - baseball - steroids...who would have guessed! Ever been to a gym? I don't see any of those guys at the center of controversy. If steroids wasn't an issue, then there wouldn't be testing on a high school level. Once again...there's things like that in every town.

Andy Dick just got busted the other day...I'm sure you've heard. Drugs and some sex thing with a 17 year old girl. Apparently, he pulled her top down in public - what a pig! That crime warranted the top spot on the AOL homepage...go figure. There's a guy like that where I'm from...he lives right up the street! Maybe Andy Dick is his role model - we should ship them all off to their own little island and make a reality show about them. Let's call it Pedophilia Island...they can live happily ever after with each other!

The media tries to tell you that they're just keeping you informed. If that was the case, they wouldn't be glamorizing it as much as they do. I'm sure the details of what they broadcast sink into the brain after the first hundred or so times they show it! That leaves the question of "why"? It's all part of society in the modern world. There seems to be this hypnotizing craze over crime and drama. That always leads to someone wanting to do it better...to become just as famous. When will it ever end?

Let's get to the topic of how they down-play certain things. Did you ever read about a story...or see one on the news that just tugged at your heart strings? I have! When my teenage boys were little, I remember a story of a boy being kidnapped. He lived about 10 miles from where we lived at the time. He was 11 years old - I think! He was a lower-middle class white boy that lived in the country. He never made it home from school one day. I can still picture his face in my head. Maybe I can remember his face because I saw his missing person poster in Wal-Mart the other day. I'm sure his parent's never stopped looking for him, but after about a week, the media didn't pay much attention to it! That really leaves something to be said about priorities!

So, I'll end this with saying that although the media doesn't cause crime, it does play it's part. With every news story comes ratings...with every crime, those ratings increase. So, to cover their desire to be the best they will flock to wherever they need to be. They will follow the dollar signs to the most high profile cases they can find. And when you turn on CNN tomorrow, just know that in a few months or years...someone will try to "out-do" the crime you are watching unfold.

Religious Debates

From Catholic to Wiccan

From Baptist to Jew

The God within me

Is the God within you

Why must we hate

Why must we kill

Our religious decision

Is our own free will

Voting under 18...

I never really thought about it before...never paid it any mind! In all reality, I should have! In my opinion, eighteen sounded like a good age to vote. Maybe it's because that's the way it's always been. Now that I'm a mother, a lot of creative ideas go through my head!

I've raised my boys to be open-minded, they follow what goes on in the world and they have their own opinions. Maybe we should attempt to get their opinions once and a while! It seems my 14 year old has his own views on the upcoming election - and he is proud to voice them. They are very different than my own...but, that doesn't matter. He makes some extremely valid points that could possibly put some middle-aged people to shame.

Maybe I shouldn't be telling anyone this, BUT I will anyway! This could possibly be the first time that I may not vote. It's not because I can't make up my mind...it's just that neither candidate seems to be very worthwhile. Sounds rude, considering who they are...heck...they're running for president! Maybe they both have something to give to the presidency, maybe they don't. Either way, I'm not convinced either of them are what this country needs. Let's put someone in office that has the American's best interests at heart. Someone who knows what it's like to have nothing...someone who's been where most of us are right now. Everyone has their own little agenda when running for president. I'd like to know how both candidates plan on helping the poor working class Americans! Seems our government would rather take care of the starving abused kids around the world while neglecting those at home. Many of us can't even afford the gas to drive to work...with the economy is such bad shape, they should be doing more to help us.

I know that I'm not the only person to feel that way...I'm disgusted by most of the politicians. They bury their hands deeper and deeper into our pockets and we get nothing in return. So, here comes my little idea of the day...

Maybe, just for once, we should let those under 18 vote! If a child is old enough to be employed at 14, why not let them voice their opinion on who could better run this country. We might be pleasantly surprised by what happens. It's not like it could make the problems any worse! I think this country has hit rock bottom on many bases...what's the worst that could happen?

After all, we are raising the future leaders of America...I think! Problem is, we don't give them any credit or privileges until they turn into adults. Then, all at once, they need to make all of their own decisions. I'm proposing that we start off slow...give them a few advantages of adulthood before they actually reach that point. Maybe then, we will see a brighter future. We will have more respectful children...they'll feel like their opinions matter. And with that, maybe our government will become a rock for us to lean on - instead of a river to drown in!