A Father's Love

(In memory of my father)

Now that I am grown with children of my own, I can still remember the days I sat on my daddy's lap. I can hear him telling the stories of when he was young. They weren't your typical walking ten miles to school in the snow stories. They held more to the imagination than that. It was my time a time that will never fade into the past. To my dad, I know that I'm still the same little girl I was 25 years ago. Some things never change.

When people look at my father, they only see the pain he lives with. If only they could look further past the surface. Through my eyes, I see the same amount of strength and love that was always inside of him. He has taught me, through his ups and downs, that it's what you have at this moment in time that matters. Every few months, we have the same conversation. It starts with him telling me how proud he is of the person I have become. Then it ends quite drastically. He lets me know that his days are numbered there are no guarantees in life. The most important thing to him is being able see his daughter and grandsons as often as he can. When I hang up the phone, the only thing left to do is cry.

Heart disease carries with it the strongest sense of fear you ever thought possible. In the blink of an eye, you're thrust into the unknown. The question lingers If there is no tomorrow, will God give us the rest of today? That is what my father lives for. He is determined to make the most out of what time he has left. In his own words, "Life's too short to get worked up over what can't be changed". These are the words to live by.

There is more to my father than his heart disease. He is the most unselfish and compassionate person that I have ever known. When I go to sleep tonight, I will dream of sitting on his lap. I will listen to his stories. I will tell him how much I love him. And before the time comes to awake, I will thank him for being my dad. To anyone walking in my shoes, the most important thing to know is that nothing will ever compare to the love of a father.